Do you struggle? Do you struggle with your monthly bills? With your boyfriend/girlfriend/wife/husband over who you are as a person? Do you put extra effort into unscrewing a too-tight lid?
Struggle is a natural process. To quote someone who knows well what struggle is, “…It is at the base of every energetic and physiologic process, good and bad for you…Every interaction you have with a human being in this dimension carries with it struggle. Struggle to attune to their need, their words, their emotions. Struggle to discern which of the chemicals in your body producing emotion will predominate as you listen, disregard or empathize with that human being….And then there is struggle at another level: discomfort, emotional and/or physical, intended to move you in some way to reconcile the discomfort, and then struggle at the cellular level where cells ‘fight’ cells, tissue dissolves, repairs, renews…” For some of us struggle is a way of life.
If struggle goes on too long without relief, a new order takes place in the body—a new norm. The presence of too many white blood cells streaming through the body, the dilation of the blood vessels, the osmotic fluid imbalance, the imperfect messaging that tells the organs how to operate become the new “normal,” which gives rise to all number of conditions abnormal to the human body. I learned this lesson personally.
It started out a small incident—a bug crawling into my ear while I was asleep and dying there, rotting until the rot went through the eardrum into my brain. However I was already full of struggle, struggle with family members, struggle with my work, my job, my recreation. All of it was struggle with no relief for it seemed, my whole life. So an abnormal condition arose—a chronic form of meningitis that for four years had me teetering on death’s door. I stopped teetering when I learned how to face struggle. With acceptance.
That wise someone told me to accept all that is. He said, “…In acceptance, there is no struggle. What you call ‘life’ and the body, are one. Struggle in your ‘reality of life’ is a mirror of what is within, and what is within reflects or dictates your reality of life. Accept all that is, every bit of your reality, every road block, every obstacle, every poor conversation, every wrinkle in the sheets, along with the love of God, the purr of a kitten, a delicious meal you have prepared. All of it. For there is no opinion of it, no right or wrong of it. It just is. It has been created for you, by you…”
The incident with the bug and subsequent years of debilitation were a lesson for me, I needed to change how I viewed life in general, my role in it specifically. I needed to understand better all of my relationships, past and present. I needed to understand who I was at the most basic level—and accept it. All of me. I can say that it has been worth it, sticking around to learn this lesson, because it is a big one, and I can pass it on to you.
Be aware of your tendencies. Do you immediately rush to a negative conclusion of an ambiguous situation? Do you find yourself defending your actions, your words your attitudes with others you may or may not respect? If you just make yourself stop in the middle of one of these situations and accept what has occurred, without opinion, you are at the first step of self-healing. Acceptance. When you accept all that is, you can start to consider alternative scenarios to your situation other than your default scenario. Consider other possibilities in your life. Consider your role in the conflict. If you do, you are on your way to the second step of self-healing: reconciliation.